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Worst hook up/date? 

inb4 Junnez lying

Haven't really got a story myself, I can remember a stage where I'd pick up girls at parties or whatever but I'd end up saying something fucked up to them or their friend and cockblocking myself, this happened multiple times. I also remember throwing a bottle at a girls brother I was with at the time once as well. I'm a nice drunk.

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2 different ones

fattie, I literally couldn't put my arms around here.

Black girl. not incredibly ghetto, but still cocoa butter.

 

I make poor decisions when drunk. I didn't even exchange numbers, let alone add on Facebook

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inb4 Junnez lying

Haven't really got a story myself, I can remember a stage where I'd pick up girls at parties or whatever but I'd end up saying something fucked up to them or their friend and cockblocking myself, this happened multiple times. I also remember throwing a bottle at a girls brother I was with at the time once as well. I'm a nice drunk.

​Worst hookup; your mom.

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​Worst hookup; your mom.

​burnt

im a black belt in chicken heads. i've had girls pretend to be pregnant so i wouldnt break up with them, girls hooking up with my friends to try and make me jealous and get closer to me in some fucked up form, one bitch had access to my bank details, paypal etc and basically tried robbing me because i broke up with her, luckily i have a sister who will beat 9 shades of shit out of a bitch

"hooked up" with a girl once after a night in town she came up to me with her sister after the club closed and i ended up going back to hers which is milesss away from civilization, anyway she tells me to go get a condom, theyre in the bottom cupboard beside THE FUCKING CERIAL. anyway i get them thinkin thats abit odd, a few hours later theres a knock on her bedroom door (it was locked) and some high pitched voice says "mommy" so yea i had to lay on the floor hiding while she took her kid to school, the pathetic excuse of a mother

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Umm taking one for the team with a fatty so my homie could get the better looking one. But he didn't even get any..........trust me that was the last time I took one for him.

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I hooked up with this girl, she was really hot, like huge tits, nice ass, and my exact style. I met her my Freshman year of classes and she did this thing where she cut her hair into a pixie cut (which turn me on big time) and I set out to fuck her. I got her twitter from a mutual friend and followed her, favorited some shit, until I could find an excuse to DM her and get her number. 

I eventually got the number and she was pretty interested. I threw a 4th of July party at my apartment, she showed up, and at the end of the night we fucked. We fucked steady for about a week after that. She was a freak. Loved anal more than anything. 

So, being the cocksucker I am, I told her I didn't want to date her, I just wanted to fuck her. She did not handle it well, but then said she accepted it and we could be friends with benefits. School started back up and she invited me and my homies to this party at her place. I knew all of the people at the party so I figured we could go, get drunk, and chill. We get there a little late, everyone is already there, and this girl is pretty fucking drunk. She keeps trying to stand next to me everywhere and touch me. I'm trying to push her away or move to another room. 

I eventually decide fuck it, then I go outside to smoke a cig and get away from her. She see's I'm gone and comes out to find me. She says "Sam, please stay with me tonight" and I say "no, I want to go home tonight and sleep."

She does not react well and gets kind of pissed at me over it. I'm standing there trying to rectify the situation and the rest of the party starts to slowly shift outside to smoke. As my friends all crowd around us, talking amongst each other, she screams "Sam! You fucked me before, why won't you fuck me now?!" like a whiny, brat. SIlence. Everyone looks at me. For a solid 30 seconds no one spoke, they just looked at me. Luckily, one of my buddies said something cheeky like "yea Sam, fuck her!" and diffuses the tension.

This girl started crying and couldn't handle the pressure so she went and sat on her porchstep. Me, being the good guy I am, went to sit next to her and console her, but it ended up just being me getting cried on for 2 hours. Eventually, my homies realized I was missing, so they came to get me and we walked home.

I wasn't drunk. I was pissed and embarrassed.

 

Since then she apologized and we hang out sometimes. She realized she didn't want to date me and we hit each other up to hookup whenever. :)

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​Worst hookup; your mom.

​>mom

I hooked up with this girl, she was really hot, like huge tits, nice ass, and my exact style. I met her my Freshman year of classes and she did this thing where she cut her hair into a pixie cut (which turn me on big time) and I set out to fuck her. I got her twitter from a mutual friend and followed her, favorited some shit, until I could find an excuse to DM her and get her number. 

I eventually got the number and she was pretty interested. I threw a 4th of July party at my apartment, she showed up, and at the end of the night we fucked. We fucked steady for about a week after that. She was a freak. Loved anal more than anything. 

So, being the cocksucker I am, I told her I didn't want to date her, I just wanted to fuck her. She did not handle it well, but then said she accepted it and we could be friends with benefits. School started back up and she invited me and my homies to this party at her place. I knew all of the people at the party so I figured we could go, get drunk, and chill. We get there a little late, everyone is already there, and this girl is pretty fucking drunk. She keeps trying to stand next to me everywhere and touch me. I'm trying to push her away or move to another ro

 

Me, being the good guy I am, went to sit next to her and console her, but it ended up just being me getting cried on for 2 hours.

 

 

​2 hours lolMines forgetting what I was doing and talking to a guy about the crusades. Renegade this forum is fucked on my tablet before you come in here to post about your marriage. Disclaimer I don't know anything about your marriage and I'm sure its fantastic

 

 

 

 

 

 

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​burnt

im a black belt in chicken heads. i've had girls pretend to be pregnant so i wouldnt break up with them, girls hooking up with my friends to try and make me jealous and get closer to me in some fucked up form, one bitch had access to my bank details, paypal etc and basically tried robbing me because i broke up with her, luckily i have a sister who will beat 9 shades of shit out of a bitch

"hooked up" with a girl once after a night in town she came up to me with her sister after the club closed and i ended up going back to hers which is milesss away from civilization, anyway she tells me to go get a condom, theyre in the bottom cupboard beside THE FUCKING CERIAL. anyway i get them thinkin thats abit odd, a few hours later theres a knock on her bedroom door (it was locked) and some high pitched voice says "mommy" so yea i had to lay on the floor hiding while she took her kid to school, the pathetic excuse of a mother

​Wow for the first paragraph I was thinking you sound like my mate who also practices the art of dating gronks. Then the second paragraph was like twilight zone except he's now dating the mother hahahaha. Bad man

 

Edit: actually he has a rank on you, one of them at the end of what had been long and rocky times, she stabbed in the face (not that badly) with a shard of glass she was threatening to slit her wrists with. I cant really remember but I think he just took her to the ground lol

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​Wow for the first paragraph I was thinking you sound like my mate who also practices the art of dating gronks. Then the second paragraph was like twilight zone except he's now dating the mother hahahaha. Bad man

 

Edit: actually he has a rank on you, one of them at the end of what had been long and rocky times, she stabbed in the face (not that badly) with a shard of glass she was threatening to slit her wrists with. I cant really remember but I think he just took her to the ground lol

your mate sounds likes a wise and knowledgeable guy.my life peaked at like 17, im 21 next week and already have one foot in the grave

not gona lie im a little disappointed, i was expecting at least 3 fairy tales of junnez' sticky fingers to help me sleep but i guess mrs zant burn is the best we're getting

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your mate sounds likes a wise and knowledgeable guy.my life peaked at like 17, im 21 next week and already have one foot in the grave

not gona lie im a little disappointed, i was expecting at least 3 fairy tales of junnez' sticky fingers to help me sleep but i guess mrs zant burn is the best we're getting

​He's a dickhead and so are you ahaha. Watched to many romance movies or something. Just stick it and run like a responsible stranger.

Junnez is still in production stage I'm sure, there'll be many a tale after editing

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your mate sounds likes a wise and knowledgeable guy.my life peaked at like 17, im 21 next week and already have one foot in the grave

not gona lie im a little disappointed, i was expecting at least 3 fairy tales of junnez' sticky fingers to help me sleep but i guess mrs zant burn is the best we're getting

​He's a dickhead and so are you ahaha. Watched to many romance movies or something. Just stick it and run like a responsible stranger.
Junnez is still in production stage I'm sure, there'll be many a tale after editing

​I could write an epic tale of conquest and dirty whores, or tell the truth about me only ever have had one girlfriend and no hookups besides that.

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HAAAAAAAAAAAA indu, fuck

 

good on you junnez bro but seriously how are you not slaying dat pussay, you're handsome young lady

​Well, I'm shy, not overly social and suck at picking up hints.

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HAAAAAAAAAAAA indu, fuck

 

good on you junnez bro but seriously how are you not slaying dat pussay, you're handsome young lady

​yeah I honestly thought hed be slaying the poon. Junnez is a cutey pie

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​thats why jesus made shit like tinder brah

​I'm too shy for Tinder, I have no concept of flirting and I'm oblivious to when it's done towards me, my only comfort is I won't die a virgin.

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​I'm too shy for Tinder, I have no concept of flirting and I'm oblivious to when it's done towards me, my only comfort is I won't die a virgin.

​all you gotta do is flick left or right? and occasionally get a match here and there wtf is there to be shy about, you dont have to meet or talk to them unless you choose to obviously. thats just inexperience, like everything you get better with practice, you can hardly expect to just turn casanova overnight but its a damn shame youre not using those genes you've inherited. go out, have a drink, go to the dancefloor, you've pulled.

you're gonna look identical to diplo in 10 years, its been bugging me for weeks and i've only just realised

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​all you gotta do is flick left or right? and occasionally get a match here and there wtf is there to be shy about, you dont have to meet or talk to them unless you choose to obviously. thats just inexperience, like everything you get better with practice, you can hardly expect to just turn casanova overnight but its a damn shame youre not using those genes you've inherited. go out, have a drink, go to the dancefloor, you've pulled.

you're gonna look identical to diplo in 10 years, its been bugging me for weeks and i've only just realised

​Who the fuck is Diplo? Also; I know I can't just be a casa-nova over night, but I'm taking it one day after another, I'll get a girlfriend when I get one.
 

Craigslist is probably more in your skillset junnez

​We don't have that in Denmark ;)

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